Anybody Wanna Buy A Street?

 I heard an interesting piece of information last night about a street for sale. It's a street most everyone knows. It's Sesame Street! So I heard Cookie Monster, Big Bird and even Elmo need a new home. I'd take Cookie Monster and Big Bird if I could. I'm not so sure about Elmo. I don't even like Elmo. Though I do like his benefactor, Kevin Clash. But if I had to take Elmo, like it's some kind of package deal where if you take 2 you'd have to take all 3, I'd give him a complete make-over! First of all, I'd teach him how to say me, and I, and myself, instead of talking about himself in the 3rd person. That sounds so stupid, and it makes Elmo unattractive! Only annoying. I'd probably keep his name, because Elmo is actually a good name for a children's show companion. I also would make him a real type animal. Not a stupid-looking little red person with fur and a big, orange nose.

I tried several different animals that all come in a red color. Any one of them would make a greater, better version of Elmo. What do you all think?

How about Elmo the fox?

Or Elmo the orangutan-monkey?

Or Elmo the cardinal?

Or Elmo the galidia mongoose?

Kids don't know what a galidia is, but they can surely learn! It never hurts to learn about different animals and the places they come from. If they can learn and be fluent in the names of dinosaurs, they can become fluent in the different types of animals that are in the world today. Sesame Street used to do that. But it seemed when they started making every new character a monster, they left that behind. So, instead of making every new muppet a non-existent monster that means nothing, I'd make them different kinds of animals that kids don't know, but should know. That way, we can also introduce children to the positives of accepting different kinds of cultures. As I understand it, Disney took over Sesame Street and did not even want any white people on the script. That's stupid!!! That was probably why Sesame Street with Disney failed! Sesame Street always had people of different races in their show. It was never "white man bad!" Sesame Street was created by white people. Though they say it was created for black children specifically. Though I don't know how true that is, I heard it from the mouth of a black person. The same group of people who say Mozart is now believed to have been black.

I'd bring back the grown-ups if I owned Sesame Street. I'd bring back a modern version of Bob, Maria, Luis, Susan, Gordon, Linda, David and even Mr. Hooper. I'd try to find people who could fill the shoes of the puppeteers who worked Big Bird, Ernie, Bert, Cookie Monster, Herry, Grover, Oscar and all those classic characters I enjoyed as a child. I'd try to get people who could make them as close to the originals as I could possibly get. I would also bring back the old-style skit cartoons, and hire people to make new ones, not this 3-D style crap. But cartoons like the ones I remember when I was a kid. I'd even try to find someone as good a musician as Joe Raposo, who wrote the music for the earlier Sesame Street skits. It'd be fun to also mix Sesame Street characters with UMG characters, see how that works out. But UMG would live in a different neighborhood, next to Sesame Street. But they would frequently visit each other. The new monster characters, like Rosita, Zoe and that weird-looking tramp Abby, they'd be GONE!!! Let another network have them! I wouldn't want them! Abby's so fucking ugly, she might scare Uncle Martin and his friends. LOL!

Sesame Street also invites celebrities to their show. Even when I was a kid, they always did that. I'd probably keep that up, but I would just be careful which ones I invite. But not only celebrities, I'd also invite scientists, real teachers, doctors, you know, people that kids can actually learn something good from. What do they learn from modern celebrities? Nothing! I'd bring on people who actually know things that kids can learn too. The only thing I would never, ever, EVER-EVER allow on my version of Sesame Street, is leftists! What they have to teach, children don't need to learn! Unlike Disney, UMG Productions is not interested in making everything political, and not interested in spreading leftist agendas! Everything is going to be completely nuance. We're going to spread the importance of free speech, and everyone's right to choose in ways children can understand, and doesn't make them feel bad.

That's what I would do if I owned Sesame Street. Bring back the old fashioned style and leave the new style out of it!